Dear Colleagues:

            Ever have a day or an issue when you wish you had not gotten
out of bed?  Or at least just kept your mouth shut?  I'm having one of
those over my announcement of the Monograph.  Let's see if I can make
this better vs. worse.

            For the record: 

1.      I am THRILLED and HONORED to have been part of the
monograph/study/work.
2.      I sent the announcement to MAC members BECAUSE I am so thrilled
and honored.
3.      Because of my intense schedule, lack of access to technology
(Until a few months ago I had no email access at the university and I
still don't have access to my listserve address books from here...Dr.
Carstarphen only recently was able to give me access to the MAC
listserve from the university), lack of time... the Monograph senior
scholars went out of their way to include me even though it meant more
work for them (calling and snail mailing, vs. email).
4.      I did NOT intend to back stab those senior scholars who worked
hard to include me or the editors for making the project manifest.
5.      I DID just want the MAC folks to know that the title, with the
painful, excluding "women and minorities" was not my idea.
6.      I DID more than once mention to the senior author(s) that "women
and minorities" is NOT a term I think anyone should use because it so
very often makes minority women feel neutered, (As Sojourner Truth said,
"Ain't I a Woman?). I can not apologize for that sentiment and it is not
mine alone.
7.      I do NOT in anyway think the title invalidates the actual study.
8.      I COULD have made a bigger, more frequent fuss about/objection
to the title had I not been moving so fast and or had I realized that it
would hit me so strongly on the front of the Monograph cover in big
letters.   
9.      I do NOT, did NOT, NEVER want the panel's main focus to be about
the title but I am not doing very well in communicating to
colleagues-who-care, but are not women of color, that the "women and
minorities" label IS inaccurate and IS insensitive to women of color (a
racial minority in many western countries but a majority on the planet).
I am feeling rather beat up myself right now and if the trouble with the
title came up at the panel I wanted more than just my opinion and a few
book titles to which to refer.  Also, so many MAC women responded
regarding the title that I thought it may come up at the panel.
10.     It IS important that the study recommendations are
included/spotlighted in the panel, not the "trouble with the title."
11.     I've never coauthored a monograph before and I was so thrilled
to do so and to see it actually happen after almost 2 years.  With the
course load, other heavy responsibilities and the EXTRA drama/trauma of
working at an HBCU (Check out the AAUP newsletter and other
sources...This is NOT me whining about my troubles when we all have our
own burden to bear.  I love the access to "my people" but I pay dearly
for that "privilege."), I may never be able to/get the opportunity to
coauthor another one.
12.     I am soooooo sorry I didn't just shut up and let MAC folks come
to the panel or not, read/see the Monograph or not, question the title
or not...but hindsight is always 20/20 right?
13.     If you have feelings/opinions about the "women and minorities"
label I'd still like to have them along with your race/gender ID for
some writing I may do later in life (If I make it to retirement?).
Obviously that work needs to be done but NOT usurping this incredible
study on which so many have worked hard and have put in so many more
hours than I have.

 

Okay...is that any better?  Those of you who know me, know my heart and
my writing/speaking/scholarship...You know they are all in the right
place.  Sorry if I dropped the ball/didn't do better.  I'm really doin'
the best I can folks.